Weekly Weigh In – July 27, 2014

As I said last week, I decided to participate in a new challenge to help me jumpstart things. My first week was pretty good, but I really struggled with getting a lot of the TurboFire moves. I also pulled my upper back at the end of last week so I needed to take the weekend a little easy. But, I think I still burned quite a few calories setting up, and taking down, a bridal shower I helped throw this weekend.

My cousin is getting married in November and his fiancé is from Chicago, but we threw her a separate Pittsburgh shower. I think everyone had a good time. In the end, it was a really nice weekend with family, new and old!

IMG_5804 IMG_5965

IMG_6082

So, it wasn’t a perfect week in that I didn’t hit all my scheduled workouts and I did enjoy a small piece of that cake, but I’m still feeling awesome. I feel ready to tackle this next week!

Week 1 results:

Weekly loss = -2 pounds. 

I lost exactly 2 pounds. I’m happy with that. It is great to see a loss after the last few months I’ve had. It takes a lot of hard work and commitment to really be successful and I know that if I really want it, need it, that I have to put in the work.

That being said – I’m not really happy with my progress with Week 1 of the workouts, partially because I didn’t make them all, let’s be real. So, I am going to repeat the first week. I’m going to do another week of the more introductory workouts because I feel like I need a better foundation before I move to the more advanced workouts. I want to minimize my risk of injury and many of these workouts aren’t made specifically for people who are as overweight as I am, also I’m highly uncoordinated, so I’m altering it. What is great about it is that I can. It is a set of DVDs so if I feel like a didn’t really reap all the benefits that I should have from the introductory week then I can go ahead and repeat it.

There is no shame admitting that you can’t do something perfectly and that you need more time or more work on something. I normally excel at a lot of things, outside of fitness and weight loss, so when I am not doing things perfectly I am really hard on myself, unnecessarily. It is something else I’ve really been working on.

I have this issue where I will try something new, not get it, and then I completely shut down. I form this mental block and become so frustrated with myself. Lately I’ve tried to be kinder to myself. If it is the first time I’m doing something then it is only natural to struggle. It takes time to learn and master things. Hey, it actually took me 7 weeks to figure out the correct move in T25 for speed and agility where it is up center, back center, out, out. If you’ve done the workouts ever you may know what I’m talking about. One thing I loved from the introductory tape of TurboFire was that Chalene Johnson even says something to the effect of: if you don’t get something just try. You don’t burn calories standing around and saying “I can’t do that.” When I don’t get a move and can’t follow along I’ll do the best I can or jog in place watching closely until I can figure out exactly what it is that I’m meant to be doing. My goal is to just not stop, just keep going and do my personal best.

So week 1 back at it and have a 2 pound loss. Feeling good and ready to conquer my workouts and meals this week! How about you?

 

NSV Linkup

For so many weeks now I’ve hosted this linkup to celebrate all of our Non-Scale Victories. I really do think that it is important to take time to reflect on the positive changes we’ve made in our lives, regardless of what the scale is showing you at the moment.

With that said, I do think that weighing yourself is important. It is a good way to keep yourself in check and hold yourself accountable. However, it is only one factor in this journey.

I’ve recently started reading “The Female Body Breakthrough” by Rachel Cosgrove  and so far I’m finding it very informative. The book was actually given to me as a gift and I’ve loved a lot of the quotes and visualizations used. In the beginning chapters she talks a little bit about determining what your weight loss goal should be:

“You have to figure out what your best body is, where you look and feel absolutely amazing.  Don’t focus on a number, but on a feeling, one of confidence and empowerment.  Most women are too focused on a magic number and forget to tune in to how they feel and how they look in their clothes.”

Because I have regularly exercised even when my weight has been fluctuating up and down, my clothing size is staying the same because I’ve lost inches, even when I may not have lost pounds. How my body adjusts to changes and how yours adjusts will be completely different.

Also, I think it is important to realize that once I hit that “magic number” on the scale all of my problems will not disappear. I’ve read a lot of articles and blogs by those who have lost a significant amount of weight and a common theme is how hard the struggle is to maintain and how losing the weight doesn’t magically solve all your issues. That is why I am taking the time to focus on the whole of the journey and take a minute to recognize other factors that show success.

By far the most challenging aspect of all of this is the mental aspect. I took a big step at the end of last week and took time to talk to a counselor. I found the visit helpful and informative. Even after one talk I realized that I could be looking at things in a different light and that I’m way too difficult on myself, aren’t we all our harshest critic?

I’ve dusted myself off, again, and I’m back to work. I recently invested in a fitbit with Audrey and we are tracking our steps. It has been a major wake up call to see how little steps I get during the work day if I don’t consciously make myself go for a walk. Many times I feel like I’m chained to my desk, but it is good for your mind to get moving and even taking a quick, short walk to refocus.

Here are my FitBit results for Tuesday and Wednesday:

fitbitWednesday was my rest day so I didn’t get in the extra steps from a workout, but still an improvement from my results during a previous work day without an extra walk.

Do you have an NSV this week? Linkup and share!

 


Restart

“The journey is as important as the destination.”

I’ve been recording my journey here for over a year and a half now. Who would have thought that when I sat down at a computer and impulsively started this blog that I’d still be here, still writing away, still trying to find my way to a healthier self. I’ve lost weight, I’ve put it back on, I’ve lost it again. . . and the cycle continued.

It hasn’t been a straight line for me. I’ve had so many ups and downs, but I’ve learned a lot. I’ve learned that my relationship with food is far deeper and more complicated than I previously thought. I’ve learned that I can enjoy exercise. I’ve learned the right and wrong foods to eat. Now – it is about putting it all together.

I spend so much time feeling like a failure, being disappointed in myself, but that is useless. It took years for me to become the person that I am today, and it will take a long time to relearn these habits and make the necessary changes. Time to overcome the mental issues I face and have better control.

Putting the past in the past, I’m hitting the “restart” button. I want to stop harping on the lack of weight loss success and just begin anew here. Take what I’ve learned and start fresh and work to make tomorrow better.

What I’ve learned has helped me in the past:

  • - Pre-planning meals. Tracking my food in advance and packing my lunch the night before. Regularly going to the grocery store and only having good things in the house.
  • - Tracking! Accurately recording my food and exercising. Not eyeballing food, measuring things out to their surviving size.
  • - Scheduling exercise and make it as important as any other appointment.
  • - Taking some time daily to reflect on the things I did well. Trying not to focus on the negative. If I make a mistake then I need to move on and not let it completely derail me.
  • - Blog regularly for accountability.

With that, I have started a 12 week workout challenge. I started TurboFire today and the first workout was tough. I felt very uncoordinated but it takes time to learn anything new.  I am committing to blogging more because in the past when I’ve recorded here I’ve been more likely to stay on track.

I’ve also started wearing my fitbit. You can add me on the website by searching ktjweighingin(at)gmail(dot)com.  I’ll be posting updates also on my instagram so feel free to follow me on there or twitter too.

Here was today’s results:

unnamed unnamed

 

It may be awhile until I reach my destination, but I’ll continue to learn and strive for improvement while I’m on this journey.

An update and NSV Linkup

So, my summer has derailed blogging it seems. I’m getting back into the groove though. I think I needed a break from this space and it was a healthy break for me to be offline more and focusing on other things.

Unfortunately I’ve still been struggling with stress and before I ever started blogging and really taking time to reflect on my habits I never thought that I may have such a strong problem with food. I definitely will binge and it isn’t healthy. I’ve really grown a lot as a person, but sometimes we have to admit when you maybe need more help. I really debated sharing this so publicly, but maybe it will help someone else. I’ve decided that I should talk to someone about my coping mechanisms, or lack there of. When I’m stressed, emotionally upset, anxious. . . I eat. It isn’t healthy and I have really been working on it, but there is obviously a deeper root and cause to why I continue to sabotage myself. Now, it may not be helpful or it could be really helpful, but I’ve decided that it is worth a try. Really being open to admitting that I need a little help.

Now, here is my plan and commitment to this blog. Sure, it is my personal blog and really I am just documenting my journey for myself – I love that I’ve met some wonderful people and I don’t want to close myself off and lose those connections. So, I want to share that I’ve recently got a FitBit and will be sharing my daily results. I’m starting a new workout challenge on Monday and so I will be reporting on that as well. I haven’t tried any new recipes lately, so a goal of mine is to get back to being more adventurous and trying out some new recipes. Finally, I owe people an update on Henry! I actually receive more emails about Henry than anything else, but he is so cute!

Ok, so this was more of an update than NSV, but here is the linkup for anyone who would like to share!

 


Non-Scale Victories

I’ve been frustrated this Summer, probably clear from my lack of posts. But, I’ve been out there living and that means less time to sit at the computer and write about it all. However, I have noticed that when I take time to reflect daily, and I know I don’t necessarily need a blog to do this, I tend to do better overall. It is great to be able to track your progress, note your triggers, see what really throws you off your game.

I’m disappointed with the scale. I feel like I’m constantly at war with it. Thinking of that ideal number that I one day will get to and then thinking about slowly chip it all off pound by pound. It is overwhelming when I have so much weight to lose. Seeing myself have a bad day and gain weight can throw off my whole day, or multiple days. It isn’t right and I know this and something I try to remind myself of. I know the weight will eventually come off because I’m making necessary life changes, but the number on the scale shouldn’t be the measure of success.

While browsing the internet, I found an older article titled “5 Reasons To Break Up With Your Scale.” I particularly related to number 5:

The Scale maintains control of your self-esteem:

 It’s psychologically unhealthy to allow a number – any number – to determine your worth, your value or your self-image. And yet, that’s exactly what happens to people who are overly invested in their scale. It’s tragic that your daily weigh-in determines whether you have a good day or  bad day, or whether or not you feel good about yourself. The scale results can take you from confident to self-loathing in under 5 seconds, but what the scale is telling you is not real.

So, regardless of what my scale says, I’ve been exercising and I feel better about myself. I feel proud and accomplished after I go to the gym. I feel like I have more control when I plan meals and have more energy at work when I’m following my plans. I feel better in my skin and you know I was in a wedding the other weekend and I could feel a difference. I was a size smaller than when I bought the dress and I felt good about myself. The scale number may  not drastically change for me and I go up and down and up and down, but the number doesn’t define me.

10341402_822990977875_18848928522524415_n